operation harelip BJ is a go
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
