Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize