week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
