I'm passing your future prison.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
