Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
