God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
How does one acquire holy water?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
