Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
