i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
