Plan B is the new Plan A
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
