Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
