I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
