we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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