Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
