why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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