everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
