I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
