IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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