You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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