I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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