Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
