my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
