He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
