if you like me you must not know who I am
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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