This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
