So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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