As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
