so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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