So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
