did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
