did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
