the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
