1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
