Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
they're like a gay fantastic four
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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