Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
