what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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