I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
