She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
