Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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