READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
