I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
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