Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
