i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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