Ambien. No doubt about it.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
