pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
