Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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