I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
