I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize