when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
