We're facebook friends in real life
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
