Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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